How to Chat with Someone Online without Losing Your Dignity, and Other Tales of Online Dating

Chat tools are some of the most widely-used tools to get to know someone new online.  They’re free, they’re quick, and you can be in your pajamas with unbrushed teeth and the person on the other end of the cyberspace is still picturing you wearing something sexy and looking hot.  The ease of use that comes with chat tools also brings with it the element of danger.  Without face-to-face accountability things can get weird quick if you’re not careful.  Here’s a quick guide to chatting someone up without losing your dignity.

  1. Ease up on the sexy stuff unless you’ve already had the sexy stuff.  Yes, there will be people who disagree with me, but the truth is…anyone can say they are anyone on the Internet…they can also save every message you send over chat.  You could be having sexy times with someone who’s seventeen years old and having a laugh with friends.  It could be someone who’s married or worse—a married politician!  This leads me to my next tip…
  2. Don’t say anything on chat that you wouldn’t say in a crowded coffee shop.  Original rules apply.  If things go south there is a record of everything you said on the other person’s computer.  Don’t expect that everyone’s as ethical as you are.
  3. Don’t type more than one to two sentences at a time.  You can lose people that way who maybe can’t type or read that fast.
  4. Do  be as cute and funny as you can possibly be.  The anonymity of chatting ought to free you up to let the good stuff fly.  People that are shy in real life can be the next Rodney Dangerfield getting “no respect” on the Internet.  If the jokes bomb, blame it on the bad delivery.
  5. Use icons like winks, hugs, kisses to convey physical actions.  If you have Skype, use the “hug” or “kiss” icon to greet someone you are involved with.  Use the wink 😉  to let people know you’re joking.  And if you ever get the opportunity to use the bear hug icon…USE IT.
  6. If you’re going to use chat that involves video, place your camera in a position facing down at you (best angle for photographing) so you look your best.

Chat tools are a great means of real time communication.  Just don’t forget that the phone works, too.