How To Win Over Your Partner’s Friends

So, you’ve met Mr. Right or Ms. Right and things are progressing well.  You’re sitting across the table from your new special interest and he (or she) tells you: I’d like you to meet my friends. Of course you want to meet The Friends–that’s the step prior to meeting The Mother, and meeting The Mother, as we all know, is the last stop on the road to Gift Registries.  You’re delighted and frightened to death at the same time.  Your mind’s racing.  What if they don’t like me?  What if I don’t like them?  Regardless of the fact that the chocolate crème brulee you just ate is now threatening to make a special guest appearance out of your mouth, you nod excitedly and try to smile.  Your next thoughts are: what can I do to make this meeting go great?

Make it go great!

Start out by learning things about the friends before officially being introduced.  Pay particular attention to the stories told of favorite friends, times and hangouts.  You can score huge friend points at a first meeting when you can relate to those friends in terms of the relationship with your boyfriend/girlfriend.  Remember the names of those you have been introduced to and reference any current information you may have about them.  For example, you have been introduced to a friend named John; congratulate him on his new job.  Next, listen to the conversations held, this will make the friends feel that they are interesting and may make them appreciate your relationship more.

Rely on Friends

Friends are a major part of our lives.  They can be our “rock”, our “secret keepers”, or our “getaway” from domesticity.  Another way to gain the respect of your significant other’s friends is to encourage them to spend time together. This will also allow you to spend quality time with your friends and maintain your individuality.  While spending time with your friends is important it is also important that you spend time with both sets of friends as a couple.  Don’t be afraid to try something new and fun.  Becoming interested in what the friends do as a group will allow you to see another side of your boyfriend/girlfriend.  If for example you join the guys for watching football, research the rules and teams playing to be able to join in the conversations intelligently.  This may also give you a chance to chat it up with the friends.  Offering to include the friends on outings will ensure that the friends don’t feel left out.

It is important to be nice to your significant other, especially in the presence of friends.  Your actions could lead the friends to believe that you aren’t the right person, and they will have great influence when you aren’t around.  It can also be important to discuss the friends with each other.  Telling funny stories and what you like about them, never say mean things, even if you aren’t fond of them.

Keep your Current Friends

Keeping pre-relationship friends is important, these are the people who have been through life’s events and have been supportive.  Finding the balance between your relationship and friendships is complicated but can be managed.

And don’t forget, a successful meeting with the friends means that you’re one step closer to meeting “Mom”.